FULL NAME: Sienna Italia Valentina
BASE IMAGE: Zooey Deschannel
ALIAS:
When in the E.A.O., Sienna was often known to many by her middle name: Italia. She never acquired any sinister or dark aliases like her sister; she never wanted to be called a viper or a black widow. And so, many came to know her simply as "The Dreamer" for she always seemed to live in her own care-free world. "Melody" became one of her operative aliases. This was acquired one day when the E.A.O. leader caught her singing to herself in the corridors. Other than that, she is known simply as Si-Si (pronounced CC); a nickname that has stuck with her since the days of her childhood.
PERSONAL CREED:
"I always seem to be at the wrong place, at the wrong time."
"You can run away from your problems, but you're just going to find new ones that pop up"
"I know I'm gullible because a lot of people tell me that and I have no reason not to believe them."
"If you really love someone, it's simple."
GENDER: Female
AGE: 23
Birth Date: 15 December 1991 (Sagittarius)
ORIENTATION: Straight
RELATIONSHIP STATUS:
Sienna was once madly in love; it was like a love from some romantic movie, that was almost indestructible. It was a foolish love, in her sister's eyes; which is why she probably never approved of it. "You never date people you work with. WE don't date people." Alessandra had always said when they were still under the employ of the Elite Assassins' Organization. Yet, Sienna didn't listen. She met a fellow assassin, and fell madly in love. The two were to be married. That is, until her sister put one bullet through his skull, the other in his chest.
Since then, Sienna has remained single, isolated. It's almost as if her heart cannot bear the thought of loving another. She will never forgive her sister for what she did.
FAMILY STATUS:
Sienna, much like Alessandra (Elexus Shaw) was born to a family whom lived by a strict, religious code of conduct. With the death of the village Elder, and her father, the only real family Sienna has is her sister, Alessandra. However; to this day she has not spoken to her, nor seen her, since that fateful day when all hell broke loose.
IS THE CHARACTER IN A GANG/LAW ENFORCEMENT AGENCY/CITIZEN?
Citizen
STATE YOUR INDUSTRY AND OCCUPATION:
Unlike her sister, Sienna was presented with the opportunity to acquire other skills in the E.A.O. She was never as good as Alessandra when it came down to the specifics of planning the perfect murder, nor did she have the heart to commit such a crime without experiencing any repercussions as a result. Alessandra managed to weasel her sister into the infirmary unit at the E.A.O., where she was taught multiple skills in terms of health care and medicine, and even obtained a degree to practice as a legitimate medical practitioner. Like fire to a house, Sienna seemed to mesh well with the profession of a healer. Her thirst for knowledge was never-ending as she researched multiple diseases that seemed rare, fascinating, and deadly at the same time.
With this acquired knowledge, Sienna was able to take up a job at the local hospital on the island of Oahu.
PERSONALITY:
Sienna is a young lady with a bubbly personality, whom often uses her cheeriness to hide the deep-rooted anguish that still eats at her heart. But, let's not confuse this with another sob story of a young, attractive girl trying to put on a strong face for the crowd. Sienna has, and always will be, an ignorant and naive girl; she puts her faith too easily in people she has barely met, using her optimistic nature to substantiate her decisions. Not everyone in the world is a criminal, so why treat everyone like they are?
To substantiate her "cheeriness", Sienna may often be found humming a merry tune, turning those frowns upside down with a few light-hearted tunes and jokes that seem utterly ridiculous you just have to laugh. She is a people-pleaser, and hates being on the receiving end of hate and dislike, even though she can dish it out herself. She wants to be everyone's friend. And with that, she has acquired a large understanding of people and their emotions.
She is a sweet-natured girl whom demonstrates a true compassion for all patients, presenting with empathy and sympathy, which can be considered as rare qualities in this day and age. Yet, her kindness should not be taken for granted; for while she may seem playful and light-hearted, there is a darker side to this girl, a face which has seen many horrors that one may have never thought to exist. She finds it easy to hold a grudge, and will take most things to heart. Take, for example, her sister. Her own flesh and blood. Sienna has never forgotten the dirty deed her sister performed, and will never see passed the true intent of her actions, only acknowledging her own childish pain. From this, many may call her conceited and self-centered, a trait she has tried so desperately to mask and ignore.
"If you really love someone, it's simple."
Much like many disillusioned young women, Sienna still believes in the perfect romance. She believes that she has experienced it first hand; and while she does not necessarily believe that she will be blessed with its warm embrace a second time, she still remains somewhat optimistic that there is that special someone out there for her. Someone who is kind, compassionate, and simply enjoys her company. She's still new to the whole concept of going out and "hooking up" with random guys for one night stands; with the death of her fiancé, a whole new world has opened up for her. A world that she remains quite tentative to join, yet still looks on with that same glimmer of hope in her eyes.
"Life is dull, until you add some colour."
Finding everyday troubles dull and boring, Sienna attempts to spice up life with an almost comic relief to her hyper-activeness. She'll most likely nab the opportunity to bust out some pretty awful puns; laughing at herself for the ridiculousness of it all. She enjoys laughing. She enjoys being merry. And she enjoys spreading her cheer to all those who look miserable and down; this is clearly seen in the way she interacts with the pediatrics' ward. Often, on her lunch breaks, she sneaks into the ward and visits the children with zesty and humorous spectacles for them to enjoy. Life is dull, until you add some colour.
BASE IMAGE: Zooey Deschannel
ALIAS:
When in the E.A.O., Sienna was often known to many by her middle name: Italia. She never acquired any sinister or dark aliases like her sister; she never wanted to be called a viper or a black widow. And so, many came to know her simply as "The Dreamer" for she always seemed to live in her own care-free world. "Melody" became one of her operative aliases. This was acquired one day when the E.A.O. leader caught her singing to herself in the corridors. Other than that, she is known simply as Si-Si (pronounced CC); a nickname that has stuck with her since the days of her childhood.
PERSONAL CREED:
"I always seem to be at the wrong place, at the wrong time."
"You can run away from your problems, but you're just going to find new ones that pop up"
"I know I'm gullible because a lot of people tell me that and I have no reason not to believe them."
"If you really love someone, it's simple."
GENDER: Female
AGE: 23
Birth Date: 15 December 1991 (Sagittarius)
ORIENTATION: Straight
RELATIONSHIP STATUS:
Sienna was once madly in love; it was like a love from some romantic movie, that was almost indestructible. It was a foolish love, in her sister's eyes; which is why she probably never approved of it. "You never date people you work with. WE don't date people." Alessandra had always said when they were still under the employ of the Elite Assassins' Organization. Yet, Sienna didn't listen. She met a fellow assassin, and fell madly in love. The two were to be married. That is, until her sister put one bullet through his skull, the other in his chest.
Since then, Sienna has remained single, isolated. It's almost as if her heart cannot bear the thought of loving another. She will never forgive her sister for what she did.
FAMILY STATUS:
Sienna, much like Alessandra (Elexus Shaw) was born to a family whom lived by a strict, religious code of conduct. With the death of the village Elder, and her father, the only real family Sienna has is her sister, Alessandra. However; to this day she has not spoken to her, nor seen her, since that fateful day when all hell broke loose.
IS THE CHARACTER IN A GANG/LAW ENFORCEMENT AGENCY/CITIZEN?
Citizen
STATE YOUR INDUSTRY AND OCCUPATION:
Unlike her sister, Sienna was presented with the opportunity to acquire other skills in the E.A.O. She was never as good as Alessandra when it came down to the specifics of planning the perfect murder, nor did she have the heart to commit such a crime without experiencing any repercussions as a result. Alessandra managed to weasel her sister into the infirmary unit at the E.A.O., where she was taught multiple skills in terms of health care and medicine, and even obtained a degree to practice as a legitimate medical practitioner. Like fire to a house, Sienna seemed to mesh well with the profession of a healer. Her thirst for knowledge was never-ending as she researched multiple diseases that seemed rare, fascinating, and deadly at the same time.
With this acquired knowledge, Sienna was able to take up a job at the local hospital on the island of Oahu.
PERSONALITY:
Sienna is a young lady with a bubbly personality, whom often uses her cheeriness to hide the deep-rooted anguish that still eats at her heart. But, let's not confuse this with another sob story of a young, attractive girl trying to put on a strong face for the crowd. Sienna has, and always will be, an ignorant and naive girl; she puts her faith too easily in people she has barely met, using her optimistic nature to substantiate her decisions. Not everyone in the world is a criminal, so why treat everyone like they are?
To substantiate her "cheeriness", Sienna may often be found humming a merry tune, turning those frowns upside down with a few light-hearted tunes and jokes that seem utterly ridiculous you just have to laugh. She is a people-pleaser, and hates being on the receiving end of hate and dislike, even though she can dish it out herself. She wants to be everyone's friend. And with that, she has acquired a large understanding of people and their emotions.
She is a sweet-natured girl whom demonstrates a true compassion for all patients, presenting with empathy and sympathy, which can be considered as rare qualities in this day and age. Yet, her kindness should not be taken for granted; for while she may seem playful and light-hearted, there is a darker side to this girl, a face which has seen many horrors that one may have never thought to exist. She finds it easy to hold a grudge, and will take most things to heart. Take, for example, her sister. Her own flesh and blood. Sienna has never forgotten the dirty deed her sister performed, and will never see passed the true intent of her actions, only acknowledging her own childish pain. From this, many may call her conceited and self-centered, a trait she has tried so desperately to mask and ignore.
"If you really love someone, it's simple."
Much like many disillusioned young women, Sienna still believes in the perfect romance. She believes that she has experienced it first hand; and while she does not necessarily believe that she will be blessed with its warm embrace a second time, she still remains somewhat optimistic that there is that special someone out there for her. Someone who is kind, compassionate, and simply enjoys her company. She's still new to the whole concept of going out and "hooking up" with random guys for one night stands; with the death of her fiancé, a whole new world has opened up for her. A world that she remains quite tentative to join, yet still looks on with that same glimmer of hope in her eyes.
"Life is dull, until you add some colour."
Finding everyday troubles dull and boring, Sienna attempts to spice up life with an almost comic relief to her hyper-activeness. She'll most likely nab the opportunity to bust out some pretty awful puns; laughing at herself for the ridiculousness of it all. She enjoys laughing. She enjoys being merry. And she enjoys spreading her cheer to all those who look miserable and down; this is clearly seen in the way she interacts with the pediatrics' ward. Often, on her lunch breaks, she sneaks into the ward and visits the children with zesty and humorous spectacles for them to enjoy. Life is dull, until you add some colour.
CHARACTER IMAGE(S):
PHYSICAL DESCRIPTION
Hair:
Sienna's hair is much like her sister's in the fact that it is a dark-brown, almost a raven-like shade, and cascades down her upper back. Naturally, her hair possesses a beautiful wavy curl that is usually worn in a messy manner; however, with the advance in hair-care, Sienna may also be seen with the typical "blow-wave" look or straightened hair, which simply accentuates the length of it. Her hair also has a miraculous sheen to it, indicating that it is healthy and strong.
Eyes:
Perhaps one of her more distinguishing traits, Sienna's eyes are definitely one of the first features anyone would notice on her. They are large, almost doe-like, and are a gorgeous clear sky-sapphire blue (depending on the lighting). Within her eyes, one may often find many of her emotions written clear as inked words in a book; they aid with her expressions and almost always make her a terrible liar. Her eyes are complemented by her naturally dark eyebrows, which frame their gorgeous shape.
Body:
Sienna possesses a petite frame, with curves in all the right places even though she is quite slender.
Tattoos:
The only tattoo that Sienna has is the horrible bar-code still present on her wrist and along the back of her neck; a reminder of the savage past she had to enjoy within the academy of assassins. This, followed with a small printed number, was her identity.
UNIQUE SKILLS AND ABILITIES:
Besides her innate ability of empathy and sympathy, Sienna has also acquired many unique skills from her years of service in the E.A.O., some of which include an invaluable knowledge of poisons and other toxins that might be used to incapacitate or kill a victim. In addition to this, she has also become fluent in Russian, Serbian, French, and Italian.
Sienna is a highly skilled medical practitioner, excelling in the study of infectious and auto-immune diseases. She also has an astounding singing voice.
STRENGTHS AND WEAKNESSES:
+ Her sense of humor
+ Her kindness and compassion
+ Her optimism
+ Her ability of sympathy and empathy
- Her naivety and ignorance
- Her persistence
- Her ability to hold grudges for long periods of time
WEAPONS:
While Sienna does not actively carry around any weapons, she still possesses the trademark Glock 19 obtained from the E.A.O., along with the engraved switchblade knife given to her by her sister upon her graduation from "rookie" status. She keeps these items stowed away in a locked box that contains other memorabilia from her past; items that she would prefer stay at bay for at least a little while longer, until she can face the demons once again.
BACKGROUND HISTORY:
14 MAY 2001
Ales did something bad today. She did something so bad that we had to leave mommy behind, and all my friends too. I'm so angry with her, I just want to shout and scream. I'm scared too. I did not know she could do that. There was so much blood. So much blood everywhere. She says she saved me, but I don't believe her. I want to go home. I don't like being on streets. It's cold. I miss my bed, and my blankie, and binky, and princess Celia. I miss mommy's warm hot cocoa. I just want to go home.
We met a strange man. He saved us from the mean, bad men who were trying to hurt us. His car was warm; I like the sound of his voice. It makes me feel safe. I wonder if he's going to be our new daddy? I hope so. He seems really nice. Him and Ales were talking so much in the car, I fell asleep. When I woke up, I was in a strange new place. He carried me. He has strong arms. The bed is soft. I cannot wait to go back to sleep.
14 MAY 2009
Eight years to the date of my first arrival at the Elite Assassins' Organization, and I still feel like an outsider walking into this secretive world. Alessandra (or Elexus as she now calls herself) has adjusted so well to the flow of things; she's top of our class. I don't know whether you can be proud of such a thing though; I mean, it's not like we're doing math or English studies, or stuff like that. When I mean she's top of our class, I mean she's basically one of the best killers the organization has come to know. Christov admires her, he makes sure she has everything she wants. She's his prized possession. I know I'm only still here because Alessandra won't leave without me, or rather, she won't let me leave without her. She still acts like my big sister. She still tries to protect me. I suppose I should appreciate this sentiment. Life hasn't been the easiest for her; I mean, she had to step up to the plate in order to make sure we survived. She helped me through the classes even though I gave up half the time. The others weren't so helpful. They're quite mean, if you ask me. Like they all have poles stuck up their asses. They're all trying to be the best, but none of them seem to be able to beat my sister. There's a top contender though - his name's Lane Radke. It's like those two were destined for each other; I mean, they're both pit bulls. They don't let go after the first bite. But I doubt she will relinquish her throne. I'm pretty sure she enjoys being top dog; I mean, who wouldn't? Right? She gets her pick of quests. She's the youngest to graduate with elite status. She's basically the Stephen Hawking of assassins right now, and I won't lie, I envy her. I just want to fit in somewhere, you know? I just want to feel like I belong, and not be shoved into a corner to look on from the shadows. I don't want the infamy. I just want to be recognized. Is that so much to ask?
This whole diary thing seems to be a work of art; I mean, I haven't had the chance to write an entry for a good couple of years, and now, I finally feel as though I can pour my heart out without having to worry about strange looks and threatening glares. It feels good. To get it all out. And now that they've sent me to the medic unit (basically where you can choose to go to if you fail at being an assassin), I have slightly more time. I suppose things worked out for the best after all. I get to look after people and myself at the same time, without having to kill. I suppose I should leave the hardcore things to my sister. She is, after all, the best at what she does. She's been that way since she was young, as far as I can remember.
2 JUNE 2009
Strangely enough, today was perhaps one of the most enjoyable days I've ever experienced in this hell hole. Why, you may ask? Well, it starts as any other romantic story does. I met this guy, and he's super nice. His name's Jacoby Radke, brother to Lane; and just like Alessandra and I, they're polar opposites. Lane is more like my sister: bad tempered, haughty, irritable, and a predator. Jacoby is sweet. He's kind, charismatic, and a gentleman of note. We met in the infirmary. We've actually known of each other for a while, but never really spoken. But that's beside the point. So he comes in with a nasty gash on his chest, and I was like one of the only people there. It must have been about 2 hours before I could actually see to him, and when I did, he was just so funny... I couldn't help but laugh. And I haven't laughed in a really long time. He added that bit of color to save me from the dullness that everything had turned to. It was a welcomed relief. He asked me out on a date a few days later. Well, today. And I said yes! What can I say? When a guy shows up at your room with a bouquet of roses? I'm a hopeless romantic, that's all I can say.
17 DECEMBER 2012
I cannot believe what has just happened. I'm still shaking, I'm so mad. I mean, I knew Alessandra had grown bitter, cold, and resentful but I don't understand what I could have possibly done for her to take it out on me! I'm her sister for crying out loud. Don't I deserve some inkling of happiness after putting up with her bullshit for years on end? I can't believe she just did it. I can't believe that she KILLED HIM. The man I love. She said she was saving me; I can understand that, but she could have done something else. Fuck knows she's smart enough to. Firstly she disappears for years, without a trace, without so much as a "call me". Her excuse, when she finally returns, when Christov finally captures her after she blew up the last headquarters, was that she "was trying to end the madness." She told me she was trying to save us from falling deeper into the pit; that she was trying to save herself from becoming a monster, that she wanted to hang on to the last strains of humanity... I can't believe I trusted her. I can't believe I fell for her lie. I can see it all clearly now; everything that she said, and everything that she promised was nothing more than a lie. Nothing more than a farce to get me to stop whining. She's so selfish. I hate her.
But before I express my anger anymore, let me actually enlighten you as to what she did to make me despise her with such a passion.
Jacoby and I were engaged. To put it bluntly, Alessandra didn't approve; she called me weak and misguided for ever trusting a man like Jacoby. For falling in love. She called me childish and ignorant and told me she would not allow the marriage to take place, so long as she was breathing. Her and Jacoby have always had it out for each other; God knows why, but they hated each other. Perhaps that's why I loved him so much? To get back at her? I mean, I know he only bore seeing her because she was my sister, but I could see the hatred in their eyes. Whenever they looked at each other, it felt as though all hell would break loose.
But this is not the reason for my rage. I came to accept this a long time ago.
When Elexus returned, Christov saw only one way of controlling her, and that was through me. He threatened my life discretely to her, she confessed this to me one day when we were alone. She was to remain his puppet on his strings; she was to remain his killer that guarded his back, and his lover behind closed doors. Of course Elexus refused to defy him, because some sanity in her seemed to care for me, or at least that's what I thought... One day, things got dangerously rowdy. I was captured by Christov and kept in a dark room, bound and gagged. He whispered his maniacal plots in my ear, of how he was going to make Elexus his; how he was going to control her like his own personal robot. He eventually revealed his plan, he told me that Jacoby was an undercover cop whom had been liaising with the FBI in order to shut the organization down. And to test Elexus' devotion, he was going to have her execute him. I didn't believe she could possibly do it. I had faith that she would, perhaps, find another way around the problem as she had in the past. I was wrong. Days later, Elexus walked in with the bar-coded skin cut from Jacoby's flesh. Her eyes had never felt so cold. With that, she delivered other items (I couldn't see them clearly) that ensured Christov of his death. I had never felt so betrayed. When I was released, I ran. I ran away from the organization and away from my sister. I didn't turn back. I didn't want to. I didn't want to believe what had just happened. I refused to. I still refuse to.
Hair:
Sienna's hair is much like her sister's in the fact that it is a dark-brown, almost a raven-like shade, and cascades down her upper back. Naturally, her hair possesses a beautiful wavy curl that is usually worn in a messy manner; however, with the advance in hair-care, Sienna may also be seen with the typical "blow-wave" look or straightened hair, which simply accentuates the length of it. Her hair also has a miraculous sheen to it, indicating that it is healthy and strong.
Eyes:
Perhaps one of her more distinguishing traits, Sienna's eyes are definitely one of the first features anyone would notice on her. They are large, almost doe-like, and are a gorgeous clear sky-sapphire blue (depending on the lighting). Within her eyes, one may often find many of her emotions written clear as inked words in a book; they aid with her expressions and almost always make her a terrible liar. Her eyes are complemented by her naturally dark eyebrows, which frame their gorgeous shape.
Body:
Sienna possesses a petite frame, with curves in all the right places even though she is quite slender.
Tattoos:
The only tattoo that Sienna has is the horrible bar-code still present on her wrist and along the back of her neck; a reminder of the savage past she had to enjoy within the academy of assassins. This, followed with a small printed number, was her identity.
UNIQUE SKILLS AND ABILITIES:
Besides her innate ability of empathy and sympathy, Sienna has also acquired many unique skills from her years of service in the E.A.O., some of which include an invaluable knowledge of poisons and other toxins that might be used to incapacitate or kill a victim. In addition to this, she has also become fluent in Russian, Serbian, French, and Italian.
Sienna is a highly skilled medical practitioner, excelling in the study of infectious and auto-immune diseases. She also has an astounding singing voice.
STRENGTHS AND WEAKNESSES:
+ Her sense of humor
+ Her kindness and compassion
+ Her optimism
+ Her ability of sympathy and empathy
- Her naivety and ignorance
- Her persistence
- Her ability to hold grudges for long periods of time
WEAPONS:
While Sienna does not actively carry around any weapons, she still possesses the trademark Glock 19 obtained from the E.A.O., along with the engraved switchblade knife given to her by her sister upon her graduation from "rookie" status. She keeps these items stowed away in a locked box that contains other memorabilia from her past; items that she would prefer stay at bay for at least a little while longer, until she can face the demons once again.
BACKGROUND HISTORY:
14 MAY 2001
Ales did something bad today. She did something so bad that we had to leave mommy behind, and all my friends too. I'm so angry with her, I just want to shout and scream. I'm scared too. I did not know she could do that. There was so much blood. So much blood everywhere. She says she saved me, but I don't believe her. I want to go home. I don't like being on streets. It's cold. I miss my bed, and my blankie, and binky, and princess Celia. I miss mommy's warm hot cocoa. I just want to go home.
We met a strange man. He saved us from the mean, bad men who were trying to hurt us. His car was warm; I like the sound of his voice. It makes me feel safe. I wonder if he's going to be our new daddy? I hope so. He seems really nice. Him and Ales were talking so much in the car, I fell asleep. When I woke up, I was in a strange new place. He carried me. He has strong arms. The bed is soft. I cannot wait to go back to sleep.
14 MAY 2009
Eight years to the date of my first arrival at the Elite Assassins' Organization, and I still feel like an outsider walking into this secretive world. Alessandra (or Elexus as she now calls herself) has adjusted so well to the flow of things; she's top of our class. I don't know whether you can be proud of such a thing though; I mean, it's not like we're doing math or English studies, or stuff like that. When I mean she's top of our class, I mean she's basically one of the best killers the organization has come to know. Christov admires her, he makes sure she has everything she wants. She's his prized possession. I know I'm only still here because Alessandra won't leave without me, or rather, she won't let me leave without her. She still acts like my big sister. She still tries to protect me. I suppose I should appreciate this sentiment. Life hasn't been the easiest for her; I mean, she had to step up to the plate in order to make sure we survived. She helped me through the classes even though I gave up half the time. The others weren't so helpful. They're quite mean, if you ask me. Like they all have poles stuck up their asses. They're all trying to be the best, but none of them seem to be able to beat my sister. There's a top contender though - his name's Lane Radke. It's like those two were destined for each other; I mean, they're both pit bulls. They don't let go after the first bite. But I doubt she will relinquish her throne. I'm pretty sure she enjoys being top dog; I mean, who wouldn't? Right? She gets her pick of quests. She's the youngest to graduate with elite status. She's basically the Stephen Hawking of assassins right now, and I won't lie, I envy her. I just want to fit in somewhere, you know? I just want to feel like I belong, and not be shoved into a corner to look on from the shadows. I don't want the infamy. I just want to be recognized. Is that so much to ask?
This whole diary thing seems to be a work of art; I mean, I haven't had the chance to write an entry for a good couple of years, and now, I finally feel as though I can pour my heart out without having to worry about strange looks and threatening glares. It feels good. To get it all out. And now that they've sent me to the medic unit (basically where you can choose to go to if you fail at being an assassin), I have slightly more time. I suppose things worked out for the best after all. I get to look after people and myself at the same time, without having to kill. I suppose I should leave the hardcore things to my sister. She is, after all, the best at what she does. She's been that way since she was young, as far as I can remember.
2 JUNE 2009
Strangely enough, today was perhaps one of the most enjoyable days I've ever experienced in this hell hole. Why, you may ask? Well, it starts as any other romantic story does. I met this guy, and he's super nice. His name's Jacoby Radke, brother to Lane; and just like Alessandra and I, they're polar opposites. Lane is more like my sister: bad tempered, haughty, irritable, and a predator. Jacoby is sweet. He's kind, charismatic, and a gentleman of note. We met in the infirmary. We've actually known of each other for a while, but never really spoken. But that's beside the point. So he comes in with a nasty gash on his chest, and I was like one of the only people there. It must have been about 2 hours before I could actually see to him, and when I did, he was just so funny... I couldn't help but laugh. And I haven't laughed in a really long time. He added that bit of color to save me from the dullness that everything had turned to. It was a welcomed relief. He asked me out on a date a few days later. Well, today. And I said yes! What can I say? When a guy shows up at your room with a bouquet of roses? I'm a hopeless romantic, that's all I can say.
17 DECEMBER 2012
I cannot believe what has just happened. I'm still shaking, I'm so mad. I mean, I knew Alessandra had grown bitter, cold, and resentful but I don't understand what I could have possibly done for her to take it out on me! I'm her sister for crying out loud. Don't I deserve some inkling of happiness after putting up with her bullshit for years on end? I can't believe she just did it. I can't believe that she KILLED HIM. The man I love. She said she was saving me; I can understand that, but she could have done something else. Fuck knows she's smart enough to. Firstly she disappears for years, without a trace, without so much as a "call me". Her excuse, when she finally returns, when Christov finally captures her after she blew up the last headquarters, was that she "was trying to end the madness." She told me she was trying to save us from falling deeper into the pit; that she was trying to save herself from becoming a monster, that she wanted to hang on to the last strains of humanity... I can't believe I trusted her. I can't believe I fell for her lie. I can see it all clearly now; everything that she said, and everything that she promised was nothing more than a lie. Nothing more than a farce to get me to stop whining. She's so selfish. I hate her.
But before I express my anger anymore, let me actually enlighten you as to what she did to make me despise her with such a passion.
Jacoby and I were engaged. To put it bluntly, Alessandra didn't approve; she called me weak and misguided for ever trusting a man like Jacoby. For falling in love. She called me childish and ignorant and told me she would not allow the marriage to take place, so long as she was breathing. Her and Jacoby have always had it out for each other; God knows why, but they hated each other. Perhaps that's why I loved him so much? To get back at her? I mean, I know he only bore seeing her because she was my sister, but I could see the hatred in their eyes. Whenever they looked at each other, it felt as though all hell would break loose.
But this is not the reason for my rage. I came to accept this a long time ago.
When Elexus returned, Christov saw only one way of controlling her, and that was through me. He threatened my life discretely to her, she confessed this to me one day when we were alone. She was to remain his puppet on his strings; she was to remain his killer that guarded his back, and his lover behind closed doors. Of course Elexus refused to defy him, because some sanity in her seemed to care for me, or at least that's what I thought... One day, things got dangerously rowdy. I was captured by Christov and kept in a dark room, bound and gagged. He whispered his maniacal plots in my ear, of how he was going to make Elexus his; how he was going to control her like his own personal robot. He eventually revealed his plan, he told me that Jacoby was an undercover cop whom had been liaising with the FBI in order to shut the organization down. And to test Elexus' devotion, he was going to have her execute him. I didn't believe she could possibly do it. I had faith that she would, perhaps, find another way around the problem as she had in the past. I was wrong. Days later, Elexus walked in with the bar-coded skin cut from Jacoby's flesh. Her eyes had never felt so cold. With that, she delivered other items (I couldn't see them clearly) that ensured Christov of his death. I had never felt so betrayed. When I was released, I ran. I ran away from the organization and away from my sister. I didn't turn back. I didn't want to. I didn't want to believe what had just happened. I refused to. I still refuse to.